Don’t Want the 80s Back Anymore

As I was waiting for the elevator to whisk me down and out of the office, I noticed another person waiting in the corridor.

He was wearing tight pants, which seems to be the “in” thing now a days. I did a double take on him and realized how ridiculous I must have looked when I was his age.

Back in the early 80s, baston pants were all the rage. We’d pair them off with colorful shirts and matching shoes and belts. Everything had to match and be color-coordinated or I wouldn’t even step out of the house.

Back then, my father glanced at me with a combined look of amusement and disdain. Later he would admit that I looked ridiculous in my attire.

I just didn’t have the heart to tell my father that I came across some old pictures of him. He wore exactly the same ensemble I had back then and looked even worse with the cowlick hair. That might explain why he hardly looks at pictures of his youth, he looked just as bad!

Well, now that I am my father’s age, I found myself in the corridor with a staring at a younger version of me. And I will admit that I couldn’t help feeling the same way my father did years ago.

At that point, I realized why the 80s shouldn’t come back anymore. At that was a time for a younger me and I have since passed in to maturity. And though it was a good time for me, I don’t want to have to go through it all over again because this time I’d feel more like a clown than someone stylish guy.

This is why I now refuse to wear anything I wore years ago. That includes tight pants, overly colorful shirts, thin tie, garrison belt, and anything argyle. I even refuse to wear my hair in a similar fashion. Not that I have much to work with anyway; but that’s beside the point.

The point is that as I got older, wearing things that were “in” became less important.

But if the 80s come back again, the market will be flooded with those types of clothes. That’s the problem I had with the “low waist” look. I couldn’t find a decent pair of jeans that wouldn’t show off my groin. And since I don’t wear low waist underwear, the garter of my briefs come out more in front than in the back

Come to think of it, I can’t decide whether one’s bottom crack showing or if the front of my bacon briefs appear. They’re both quite gross!

So like a good movie gone by, let’s leave well enough alone and not do a remake. You might just end up getting something worse than the original.